WHY LAW SCHOOL statement Please help me revise!!

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nicehyhy
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Joined: Sun Oct 24, 2010 2:21 pm

WHY LAW SCHOOL statement Please help me revise!!

Postby nicehyhy » Sun Oct 24, 2010 2:36 pm

WHY LAW SCHOOL
Last edited by nicehyhy on Mon Dec 14, 2015 7:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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2014
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Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2010 3:53 pm

Re: WHY LAW SCHOOL statement Please help me revise!!

Postby 2014 » Sun Oct 24, 2010 2:51 pm

It's alright overall. Your conclusion needs to be stronger in particular. I understand your last sentence is there to connect it back to your intro, but it is a weak way to finish it out.

You also really need to have someone who speaks English as their first language go through your essay in detail and help you with the grammar things. I mean no offense by that, but there are plenty of little errors or quirks in there that are going to distract adcomms from your purpose.

nicehyhy
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Oct 24, 2010 2:21 pm

Re: WHY LAW SCHOOL statement Please help me revise!!

Postby nicehyhy » Sun Oct 24, 2010 3:19 pm

2014 wrote:It's alright overall. Your conclusion needs to be stronger in particular. I understand your last sentence is there to connect it back to your intro, but it is a weak way to finish it out.

You also really need to have someone who speaks English as their first language go through your essay in detail and help you with the grammar things. I mean no offense by that, but there are plenty of little errors or quirks in there that are going to distract adcomms from your purpose.


thank you for your comment!! Any suggestion on what to add in conclusion???




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