(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
4 posts • Page 1 of 1
- Posts: 411
- Joined: Tue Oct 05, 2010 8:18 pm
While reading, it was unclear how long your worked in that position. It also took me some time to figure out what role the video played. You mention the video, but I have to go mid way into the next paragraph before I can make a strong inference of which side the video proved. I would clearly state the role of the video when you mention it. Just my .2
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