Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
LawStudent_DC
Posts: 24
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:40 pm

Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby LawStudent_DC » Mon Aug 30, 2010 10:27 pm

-edit
Last edited by LawStudent_DC on Thu Jun 28, 2012 3:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

LawStudent_DC
Posts: 24
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:40 pm

Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby LawStudent_DC » Mon Aug 30, 2010 10:30 pm

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Last edited by LawStudent_DC on Tue Jan 15, 2013 11:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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jtemp320
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Joined: Fri Jul 30, 2010 6:27 pm

Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby jtemp320 » Mon Aug 30, 2010 10:40 pm

I see what you are trying to do but, just my two cents, I don't think the Rudy thing works. If someone hasn't seen the movie it falls flat - even if they have it seems too much like a gimmick.

Your accomplishments are unique and very impressive and your numbers are good - you will get into a great law school but I think you will help yourself more if you try a different framework.

Sorry if that wasn't what you wanted to hear and good luck

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ShuckingNotJiving
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Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby ShuckingNotJiving » Mon Aug 30, 2010 11:07 pm

I agree with this:
jtemp320 wrote:I see what you are trying to do but, just my two cents, I don't think the Rudy thing works. If someone hasn't seen the movie it falls flat - even if they have it seems too much like a gimmick.
.

Making the comparison to Rudy makes your experience seems less unique and more, as the above poster maintained, gimmicky.

Also, unless using dialogue (or, for whatever reason, quoting the lionel ritchie song)-- one should never introduce an admissions essay with "hello."

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beach_terror
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Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby beach_terror » Mon Aug 30, 2010 11:16 pm

I was really hoping this was either going to be 1) a personal statement for Rudy or 2) one of those long stories that morphs into the theme song from the Fresh Prince by the end.

But seriously, drop the Rudy bit. This is a professional example of your writing as well as why you want to go to law school. You could shape it much better.

LawStudent_DC
Posts: 24
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:40 pm

Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby LawStudent_DC » Tue Aug 31, 2010 9:17 am

thanks for everyones input. for anyone else who happens to read this.. do you think the body of the PS is going in a good direction? If i strip my PS of the Rudy framework, but keep the meat of the PS, will it work?

LawStudent_DC
Posts: 24
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:40 pm

Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby LawStudent_DC » Tue Aug 31, 2010 11:36 pm

sorry for posting on this thread again, but I'm really looking to see if the meat of my PS is heading the right direction? any feedback?

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Rudy
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Re: Rudy needs help on his personal statement..

Postby Rudy » Wed Sep 01, 2010 6:08 pm

How'd you know I needed help on my personal statement?

:?:




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