critique please - GPA addendum

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yung
Posts: 104
Joined: Mon Jun 01, 2009 4:39 pm

critique please - GPA addendum

Postby yung » Tue Jan 19, 2010 3:29 pm

During my second semester of sophomore year at Rutgers University, my grandmother fell into a coma during a stroke. This turn of events caused me to struggle academically, contributing to my XXX GPA of that semester. My grandmother resided in Taiwan and after the occurrence of the coma, my parents had to fly back and forth frequently between the United States and Taiwan. During that period of time I drove 20 miles after classes to go back to my hometown to visit and take care of my younger sister and drove back the next morning to be in time to catch my classes. After my grandmother’s condition was stabilized, I had more time to focus on my education. This being the case, I feel that my overall GPA is not a good example of my academic potential. I hope that my upward trend and my LSAT score will show my best years are to come in the future.

What do you guys think?

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devilishangelrjp
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Re: critique please - GPA addendum

Postby devilishangelrjp » Tue Jan 19, 2010 3:33 pm

yung wrote:During my second semester of sophomore year at Rutgers University, my grandmother fell into a coma during a stroke. This turn of events caused me to struggle academically, contributing to my XXX GPA of that semester. My grandmother resided in Taiwan and after the occurrence of the coma, my parents had to fly back and forth frequently between the United States and Taiwan. During that period of time I drove 20 miles after classes to go back to my hometown to [strike]visit and[/strike] take care of my younger sister and drove back the next morning to be in time to catch my classes. After my grandmother’s condition was stabilized, I had more time to focus on my education. This being the case, I feel that my overall GPA is not a good example of my academic potential. I hope that my upward trend and my LSAT score will show my best years are to come in the future.

What do you guys think?


That's all I have to say about it. Looks good to me.

yung
Posts: 104
Joined: Mon Jun 01, 2009 4:39 pm

Re: critique please - GPA addendum

Postby yung » Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:18 pm

really? this is good enoguh for me to submit right now??

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guyincognito
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Re: critique please - GPA addendum

Postby guyincognito » Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:21 pm

almost. best years to come in the future sounds little redundant. Also, I would probably say that "my overall GPA may not be an accurate indication of my academic potential". I think that sounds less rigid.

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PDaddy
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Re: critique please - GPA addendum

Postby PDaddy » Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:26 pm

devilishangelrjp wrote:
yung wrote:During my second semester of sophomore year at Rutgers University, my grandmother fell into a coma during a stroke. This turn of events caused me to struggle academically, contributing to my XXX GPA of that semester. My grandmother resided in Taiwan and after the occurrence of the coma, my parents had to fly back and forth frequently between the United States and Taiwan. During that period of time I drove 20 miles after classes to go back to my hometown to [strike]visit and[/strike] take care of my younger sister and drove back the next morning to be in time to catch my classes. After my grandmother’s condition was stabilized, I had more time to focus on my education. This being the case, I feel that my overall GPA is not a good example of my academic potential. I hope that my upward trend and my LSAT score will show my best years are to come in the future.

What do you guys think?


That's all I have to say about it. Looks good to me.


It's good and succinct. Instead of saying that the overall GPA is not a good indicator, I would tell what specifically the adscom should note in the latter years, ex: upward trend + specific example of difficult courses. one or two sentences would be fine. You should also note whether your major GPA is higher than your cumulative GPA. But good job of showing the trickle-down effect of your grandmother's illness and your added responsibilities.

Miracle
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Re: critique please - GPA addendum

Postby Miracle » Fri Jan 22, 2010 8:47 pm

I love it! Its short-to the point. It's excellent.




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