Biology

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
MSRP
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:25 pm

Biology

Postby MSRP » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:27 pm

none
Last edited by MSRP on Fri Feb 19, 2010 4:15 pm, edited 3 times in total.

ambition23
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Jul 06, 2009 2:22 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby ambition23 » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:48 pm

without reading any of it, it's entirely too long. i copied it in word and it's nearly 1200 words and two single-spaced pages. if i was an adcom, i wouldn't want to read through it.

MSRP
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:25 pm

none

Postby MSRP » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:54 pm

none
Last edited by MSRP on Fri Jan 08, 2010 8:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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fl0w
Posts: 1404
Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2009 9:46 am

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby fl0w » Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:59 pm

ambition23 wrote:without reading any of it, it's entirely too long. i copied it in word and it's nearly 1200 words and two single-spaced pages. if i was an adcom, i wouldn't want to read through it.


agreed.
tl;dr

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Georgiana
Posts: 647
Joined: Wed Jul 22, 2009 5:42 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby Georgiana » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:07 pm

The PS is supposed to be two double spaced pages for most schools.

I read through most of it (before realizing it was entirely too long) and it looks like a good start. In order to cut down, you should probably pick one topic (Bio or Crew) instead of trying to discuss them both.

Once you get it down to 2 pages, repost and you'll probably get more substantive critiques :)

MSRP
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:25 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby MSRP » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:11 pm

Rutgers Camden says to keep it below 4 pages double spaced. That's what this is.

MSRP
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:25 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby MSRP » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:28 pm

Which topic do you think is better? thanks

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Georgiana
Posts: 647
Joined: Wed Jul 22, 2009 5:42 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby Georgiana » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:41 pm

MSRP wrote:Rutgers Camden says to keep it below 4 pages double spaced. That's what this is.

Which is why I made it a point to say "most." Of course some schools have different rules. If you're only applying to Rutgers Camden then its fine to keep this one, but usually people are applying to more than one school.

I think the crew topic is more "personal" whereas talking about your work is more that I would expect in a Statement of Intent (likely what you wrote for your grad school apps).

MSRP
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2010 3:25 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby MSRP » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:49 pm

Thanks,

Anyone else have any advice about how the essay is written, strong topic, etc. I am trying to cut it down to 900 words, so this should be fine.

athena
Posts: 16
Joined: Sat May 02, 2009 4:31 pm

Re: PhD in Biology. Can someone please critique PS Thanks

Postby athena » Fri Jan 08, 2010 5:50 pm

You definietely need to cut short on words. I dont know where you are applying to, but if you coudl use your experience working for patent lawyers in some sort of a diversity essay or how you could contribute to the program, you could save your words. But you have not exaxctly spoken about why you would make a good law student.




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