My Negotiation Email Forum

[ganggreen]

Sorry for the length. Here's what I'm looking at:

Scholarship Schools: W&M (12/year), W&L (40/year), Wake (30/year)

T30 Acceptances, sticker: BC, BU, Fordham, ND, UCLA

UVA Acceptance

My plan is to try to negotiate with each of the T30 sticker schools (except maybe UCLA). I'm not too optimistic, but I have nothing to lose; worst case scenario they all say no and I choose UVA. Also, BC is slowly rolling out their scholarships so there's a small chance I could still get an offer from them (which is why I may wait at least another week to negotiate anywhere... a BC scholly could help a lot).

Anyway, I'm just curious about how I should phrase an initial email to these schools. I've pasted what I have so far below--any feedback, including things I may want to add, is appreciated.



Dear __________,

Thank you for the offer of admission at _______. While I am excited at the opportunity to attend, merit aid will play a significant role in my decision-making process.

I was wondering to whom I can direct questions about merit scholarships. I have several offers from other law schools would be happy to scan them and send them through email.

(Message about why I want to attend _______ school here)

Sincerely,
Me

[breadbucket]

Got into UVA, but no money at UCLA? Hmmmm.... *begins to unholster troll detector*

[ganggreen]

Got into UVA, but no money at UCLA? Hmmmm.... *begins to unholster troll detector*

I got into UCLA Friday and haven't even received the acceptance packet, so who knows. And if you look at my lsn you'll see I'm a reverse splitter.

And sorry, UVA is a T14 UCLA is what, 15 or something? Do you think everyone who gets into a T14 gets a UCLA scholarship?

[romothesavior]

It's pretty solid. I think the key is to keep it short and to the point, and try to toe the line between blunt (I want more money) and gracious (You guys rock!). They knew why you are contacting them, and they've done this song and dance dozens (hundreds?) of times before. I'd hit up all of these schools, including UCLA.

Also, calling troll on this is just downright asinine.

[landla]

I might add a little more meat in terms of why you like the school and then other schools as well as specific offers (depending on the school). I've been laying it all out: acceptances, then scholarships and why I like that school/benefits of it, and then whichever I was waiting for still.

Also, BU and BC are both still rolling out scholarships. I was accepted before Christmas and received my BC information Friday and BU information Saturday.

[CanadianWolf]

Offer more info. Direct your e-mail to the Admissions & Financial Aid office or to the Dean of Admissions & Financial Aid (even though often the correct title is Ass't Dean of Admissions & Financial Aid). Include information regarding your actual scholarship offers so that the school can offer an appropriate response rather than starting a chain of e-mail correspondence.

[llachans]

What the others said. Send it directly to Admissions and Financial Aid, but make it a lot longer. Say why you are interested in UVA but why the other schools would also be a fit. At the end, re-state that you're enthusiastic about UVA but have some financial concerns.

Good luck!

[ganggreen]

I might add a little more meat in terms of why you like the school and then other schools as well as specific offers (depending on the school). I've been laying it all out: acceptances, then scholarships and why I like that school/benefits of it, and then whichever I was waiting for still.

Also, BU and BC are both still rolling out scholarships. I was accepted before Christmas and received my BC information Friday and BU information Saturday.

Thanks for the feedback everyone.

When you say that you list your acceptances, do you include most/all of them? In an email, say, to ND, should I include acceptances (without scholarship) to more than just UVA, like BC/BU?

I also have some full rides at T2 schools. Is that even worth mentioning in a negotiation email to a T30?

[landla]

I might add a little more meat in terms of why you like the school and then other schools as well as specific offers (depending on the school). I've been laying it all out: acceptances, then scholarships and why I like that school/benefits of it, and then whichever I was waiting for still.

Also, BU and BC are both still rolling out scholarships. I was accepted before Christmas and received my BC information Friday and BU information Saturday.

Thanks for the feedback everyone.

When you say that you list your acceptances, do you include most/all of them? In an email, say, to ND, should I include acceptances (without scholarship) to more than just UVA, like BC/BU?

I also have some full rides at T2 schools. Is that even worth mentioning in a negotiation email to a T30?

I did. I think both are a good idea.