Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

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Bauer24
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Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby Bauer24 » Sun Sep 11, 2011 12:50 pm

So I put off applying to law school again to work another year, spent the first year in Chicago and recently transferred to New York to be closer to my gf who lives in New Jersey and works in New York.

From looking at law school admissions statistics, I think the clear decision for me is to apply Early Decision to Northwestern and see what happens. I've already visited the law school and think it's a fantastic fit for me.

However, there is one big problem, I sincerely doubt my girlfriend will move to Chicago with me. She doesn't want to be far away from her family. She has already told me if I go back to Chicago that she wouldn't move there.

We've only been dating for a year and a half now. We spent nine months apart last year. It was difficult, especially when we were both busy. There were times when we would only have one fifteen-minute conversation in a week because we were both busy.

A problem has stemmed from our very different working styles. She works slowly and methodically. I work quickly and actively. So even when I have "more work", she "spends more time working".

This problem also came up in undergrad when we were in the "beginning phase".
I would want to chat on a Friday night and she would tell me, "Too busy".

We came pretty close to breaking up around Christmas. With all that said, we click very well when we're together. (The reason why the breakup/timeout never happened) I just feel that things get worse when we are apart and that is a reason why I'm wary of applying Early Decision to my top-choice law school. I feel like she kind of "tunes me out mentally" when we are apart. An "out of sight, out of mind" mindset. I'm not dependent on her at all but I feel like I miss her more than she misses me when we are apart.

It admittedly became hard to stay in "LDR mode" last year-especially when surrounded by cute (and single) girls who I got along with...I stayed loyal though. I think there are more girls in my life than there are guys in her life.

I have to think of my future and will be most likely sending an ED app to NU. I already know that I won't be completely miserable in Chicago even if she isn't there (a lot of good memories last year, :D , I also personally like Chicago more than NYC)..but still it's something to think about.

Things are going really well right now especially now that we live much closer to each other. [I'm in an apt in Jersey City, she still lives with her parents.] However, I know all of that will change if I go live "far away" again.

If I get in, any tips for three years of LDR management?

More info: My stats are 3.06 GPA/177 LSAT, 2 years work experience as a financial analyst by the time I start.

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thelawschoolproject
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby thelawschoolproject » Sun Sep 11, 2011 2:48 pm

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Last edited by thelawschoolproject on Sun Sep 02, 2012 3:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

bdubs
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby bdubs » Sun Sep 11, 2011 3:10 pm

Why not ED to NYU or Penn and hope that it works out? I think you stand a pretty good chance of getting NU RD.

4910
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby 4910 » Sun Sep 11, 2011 3:17 pm

I'm going to try and make this as candid as possible: you should never do for someone what they are unwilling to do for you.

this especially applies to serious relationships if you want a meaningful one that is a positive contribution to your life.

AffordablePrep
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby AffordablePrep » Sun Sep 11, 2011 3:25 pm

I don't now if this is a tit for tat thing.

There are people who are just closer to their family than others. This does not mean that they have a better relationship, just one that requires more time together. I love my family very much, but maybe have a brief convo every week just to make sure they are doing okay, while my girlfriend can't go a night without speaking to her family.

I think the greater point to consider is that if your girlfriend will not move to Chicago, and you work in Chicago then there is not really a lot of long term potential. I can understand the hesitation to move if kids are involved, but here it does not seem feasible. However, if I were advising my sisters or being objective with my girlfriend, I would not really expect her to move without a ring on her finger.

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Bauer24
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby Bauer24 » Sun Sep 11, 2011 4:14 pm

Thanks for all the good advice!

I'm very unsure of where things will go in terms of our relationship, I won't let her get in the way of my career goals/aspirations though. She's not willing to budge for anything [very stubborn and set in her ways], so I guess I have to take the same route. I love her and I think she loves me too but, at times, I think she takes me for granted.

However, I am going to take a look at Penn/NYU especially if I have a chance of getting in one of those schools if I send in an ED application. Have done some research on NYU, not much on Penn yet.

Yet again, thanks!

bdubs
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby bdubs » Sun Sep 11, 2011 5:16 pm

Bauer24 wrote:However, I am going to take a look at Penn/NYU especially if I have a chance of getting in one of those schools if I send in an ED application. Have done some research on NYU, not much on Penn yet.


I think NYU is a long shot and will depend a lot on the quality of your financial analyst gig and your undergrad school/major. However, there are a couple of examples on LSN of people getting NYU with sub 3.4 GPAs, but a lot of rejections too.

Here is one: http://lawschoolnumbers.com/seinfeldfan

Penn is a more likely option, they accepted a few high 170's splitters with GPAs at or below the usual 3.3 floor. If you threw in an ED (which none of high LSAT splitters did last year) I think you would have good odds.

http://penn.lawschoolnumbers.com/applic ... ,8&type=jd

PS: Relationships are a really personal thing, I wouldn't really wouldn't take random internet advice to heart too much. Although seeking out that advice on a forum like this should probably tell you something when you start your self reflection.

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ahduth
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby ahduth » Sun Sep 11, 2011 5:39 pm

Do you have to ED to NU with those numbers? I'm skeptical, particularly with work experience.

And NYU is a TTT. Shoot for Penn - Ivy League or bust.

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Samara
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby Samara » Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:07 am

If I were you, I'd definitely ED to NYU or Penn. There is so little data that it's hard to predict, but Penn is probably a little more likely. NYU is definitely your best shot at the T6 and would probably be easier to make it work with your gf, so not an easy decision.

I queried LSN for ED applicants 3.00-3.35/173-180, excluding int'l, URM and non-trads over the last five cycles. For NYU: 3.34/180 IN, 3.35/174 WL, 3.28/174 WL-IN. For Penn: 3.28/175 IN, 3.35/174 IN, 3.13/176 IN, 3.27/174 IN. As you can see, Penn looks a little more favorable, but nobody has numbers like yours so it's very hard to say. The 3.13/176 is closest and that applicant had no post-grad WE and just a few scholarships/grants, so I think you're in great shape for Penn ED, possibly NYU ED.

I think you're in at NU via regular decision, so don't waste an ED there. Just make sure you do the interview.

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Bauer24
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby Bauer24 » Wed Sep 21, 2011 4:46 pm

Thanks, I'm planning on applying to Penn ED right now. :)
Interestingly, for reasons mostly unrelated to my gf hahaha.

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Samara
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Re: Northwestern ED? Risk a long-term relationship for it?

Postby Samara » Wed Sep 21, 2011 4:51 pm

Bauer24 wrote:Thanks, I'm planning on applying to Penn ED right now. :)
Interestingly, for reasons mostly unrelated to my gf hahaha.

haha, good luck! All this NU ED business just reinforces the wisdom of that decision.




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