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Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:34 am
by FutureLS10
http://www.cooley.edu/newsevents/2011/0 ... hools.html

I almost fell out of my chair in laughter. What kind of mindless moron would fall for the Cooley scam? Is Cooley the 'university of pheonix' of law schools?

Rankings:
1. Harvard
2. Cooley
3. Yale

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:35 am
by dr123
holy shit new cooley rankings no way!

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:35 am
by Ignatius Reilly
Mods, please delete this fing thread

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:35 am
by Curry
ibtl... again

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:40 am
by Grizz
Image



H T H

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:56 am
by Ignatius Reilly
they should code into the forum that whenever cooley is mentioned the post wont post

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 12:13 pm
by johnnyutah
FutureLS10 wrote:http://www.cooley.edu/newsevents/2011/020411_judging_the_law_schools.html

I almost fell out of my chair in laughter. What kind of mindless moron would fall for the Cooley scam? Is Cooley the 'university of pheonix' of law schools?

Rankings:
1. Harvard
2. Cooley
3. Yale

You even quoted the rankings wrong. Cooley has GULC at #3.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:50 pm
by clone22
johnnyutah wrote:
FutureLS10 wrote:http://www.cooley.edu/newsevents/2011/020411_judging_the_law_schools.html

I almost fell out of my chair in laughter. What kind of mindless moron would fall for the Cooley scam? Is Cooley the 'university of pheonix' of law schools?

Rankings:
1. Harvard
2. Cooley
3. Yale

You even quoted the rankings wrong. Cooley has GULC at #3.

Who cares? At least now we know cooley is #2. brb gotta apply there now

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 3:56 pm
by FutureLS10
johnnyutah wrote:
FutureLS10 wrote:http://www.cooley.edu/newsevents/2011/020411_judging_the_law_schools.html

I almost fell out of my chair in laughter. What kind of mindless moron would fall for the Cooley scam? Is Cooley the 'university of pheonix' of law schools?

Rankings:
1. Harvard
2. Cooley
3. Yale

You even quoted the rankings wrong. Cooley has GULC at #3.


How dare I misreport the data in this invaluable source of pertinent information.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:34 pm
by ran12
There are def people out there that aren't so bright and want to be lawyers who go to Cooley believing the shit they spill out. How else can Cooley have so many students.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:36 pm
by 99.9luft
IBTL

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:37 pm
by Bosque
viewtopic.php?f=10&t=147064

Go there. Not here.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:38 pm
by MrPapagiorgio
Wow. Cooley trolling is out of control on TLS. Now I know why people became upset at my Cooley trolling last week. I didn't realize how big of a problem it really is. My apologies.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:43 pm
by Bosque
MrPapagiorgio wrote:Wow. Cooley trolling is out of control on TLS. Now I know why people became upset at my Cooley trolling last week. I didn't realize how big of a problem it really is. My apologies.


To be fair, the recent flare up has a lot to do with the release of the rankings, and the fact that Cooley threw caution to the wind this time and decided to go for broke. I think I would have actually had MORE respect for them (comparative to now) if they had just come out and made themselves #1. #2 is just the ultimate douche move.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 4:43 pm
by lolschool2011
Cooley threads are so redick.... everyone knows Southern University in Baton Rouge is the ultimate in TTTTTT enjoyment.

Numbers per TLS:

Southern University (LA) 2.48-3.13 143-149 11.5

True story, bro.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 5:46 pm
by androstan
lolschool2011 wrote:Cooley threads are so redick.... everyone knows Southern University in Baton Rouge is the ultimate in TTTTTT enjoyment.

Numbers per TLS:

Southern University (LA) 2.48-3.13 143-149 11.5

True story, bro.


Wow. 75% of their students couldn't break 150.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 5:47 pm
by Bildungsroman
Alright, this story was sort of funny the first time it was posted. The third thread on the subject has killed that feeling in me and replaced it with a feeling of contempt for whoever starts these threads again.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:46 pm
by Dr. Strangelove
Oh I see what Cooley did here....
JD Total Enrollment (1)
JD Total Minority Enrollment (1)
JD First Year Matriculants (1)
JD First Year Minority Enrollment (1)
Percentage of Students Receiving Grants/Scholarships (1)

:lol:

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:58 pm
by Bosque
Dr. Strangelove wrote:Oh I see what Cooley did here....
JD Total Enrollment (1)
JD Total Minority Enrollment (1)
JD First Year Matriculants (1)
JD First Year Minority Enrollment (1)
Percentage of Students Receiving Grants/Scholarships (1)

:lol:


*Ehem*

Bosque wrote:Because I don't want to do my ethics reading, I decided to brave the threat of madness and descend into the abyss of the Cooley methodology. I have miraculously survived, and return bearing the dark, twisted secret of Cooley's unholy power. I give you, the criteria by which Cooley is ranked in the top 5:

FACTOR________________________________________DATA_______RANK
JD Total Enrollment...............................................3,727.............1
JD Minority Total Enrollment...................................858..............1
JD First Year Matriculants.......................................1,510............1 (Notice the ratio of this number to total enrollment)
JD First Year Minority Enrollment.............................513..............1
JD Foreign National Enrollment................................149..............1
Part-Time Faculty....................................................162..............3
Total Faculty............................................................286..............2 (but the S/F Ratio is 23.5/rank 190)
% of Students Receiving Grants/Scholarships..........100.0.............1
Number of Professional Librarians.............................25...............4
Library Seating Capacity.........................................1,058.............2
Networked Computers Available...............................251.............4
Library Total Square Footage................................100,763...........4
Law School Square Footage Excluding Library.......589,932..........1
Total Law School Square Footage..........................690,695..........1
Number of States in which Graduates Employed........39...............1

I have a problem with just about every single one of these criteria. Total enrollment? Being lost in a sea of bodies is supposed to be a good thing? Networked Computers Available? Everyone should have a laptop, why are you wasting money here? Total Law School Square Footage?!? Are we talking about real estate, or a SCHOOL?

Even the ones I like in general are misleading. More faculty is good, but only because it decreases the student to faculty ratio... which in Cooley's case is a horrible 23.5. Further, even that number is misleading. Cooley has a part time to full time faculty ratio of 1.67. In contrast, Stanford (Cooley's number 30) has a ratio of 0.5. Cooley pumps their faculty numbers up by employing a ton of part timers who teach very little are never around. So that 23.5 is even bleaker than it seems.

I think the most egregious factor there is Cooley's grants/scholarships ranking. Seems really positive at first glance, right? Here is their description:

Percentage of Student Receiving Grants/Scholarships-Legal education costs are lowered through various forms of grants and scholarships. Schools that offer the broadest coverage reduce the overall educational cost to the greatest number of students.


Note that they don't have a category for total scholarship funds available. So Cooley could be (and is) giving out tiny, meaningless scholarships to all of their students that are not actually helping anyone, and somehow this is better than a school who manages to give 10% full rides, another 40% half tuition, and makes everyone else pay sticker. I mean, look at Cooley's Median (not mean!) grant amount: $7,704. So all Cooley needs to do is pay around 10k to the top half of the class, and then give 500 bucks to everyone else (or really, a dollar). Despicable.

I know I am preaching to the choir here, but I want to point out one last thing I find rather telling (if that #2 Rank wasn't already enough). Here are Cooley's five WORST ranked categories:

FACTOR________________________________________DATA_______RANK
First time Bar Passage Percentage.........................80.58..........160
Percentage of Graduates Employed.......................78.8............181
Median Undergraduate Grade Point Average..........2.99...........186
Median LSAT Score................................................146............189
Student Faculty Ratio.............................................23.5...........190

Notice what each of these has in common? These are the factors Cooley had to throw in to generate some semblance of legitimacy. They are the things people actually care about when choosing a law school. Without them, Cooley's "objective factors" are even easier to see as what they are: a cherry picked string of meaningless stats. Stats which Cooley knows no other law school cares to game, which they can comfortably move themselves to the top of. Stats which are largely related to the unethical way Cooley runs their scam.

Which, ultimately, is what pisses me off. I know no one with a brain is going to be fooled by this, but it doesn't mean they should be allowed to proceed with impunity. This IS a scam, only Cooley is not just cheating their saps out of money. Cooley is stealing their futures away.

Feel free to discuss in the future the virtues of excluding "elitism" people believe the US News promotes in their rankings, but please leave Cooley and their rankings out of it. Bringing up the fact that you agree with the "point" Cooley is "making" hurts your cause. Cooley is NOT trying to make that point, they are just trying to latch on to the debate, like a parasite, and feed on the more gullible of the people you persuade to your point of view. You should hate them even more than the rest of us.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 1:12 pm
by BeautifulSW
Absolutely devastating analysis. The ranking system borders on the delusional. Or maybe fraudulent except that no one is likely to rely upon it to their detriment.

I litigated against a Cooley grad from time to time. He was a decent lawyer. I think he went there because the school made itself tuition-free for him. Probably trying to bolster those awful Bar passage rates and such. Gotta maintain that Top Ten ranking, ya know.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 2:17 pm
by JusticeHarlan
Bosque wrote:Library Total Square Footage................................100,763...........4
Law School Square Footage Excluding Library.......589,932..........1
Total Law School Square Footage..........................690,695..........1

This is the best most egregious part. "Total law school square footage" is nothing but the sum of two other factors. They count each of them separately, then add them together and weigh that equally.

Re: Wow, Cooley... Wow.

Posted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 2:49 pm
by redsoxfan2495
I have to admit, I'm quite impressed that they managed to design a formula in which they ended up so high and lots of other shitty JD mills didn't. It must have taken a lot of tweaking to come up with a list in which most of the other highly ranked schools seemed reasonable.