The importance of having a support system during school.

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mhd08
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The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby mhd08 » Mon Feb 22, 2010 12:57 am

At the moment, I've been accepted to schools in my home state of NJ and a school across the country (Denver). I've always wanted to live in Colorado, but a regional law school makes the option of moving back to the Northeast (should I want to) pretty much out of the question. It's a pretty permanent move, and the only person I know in Denver is an ex-boyfriend who I don't really plan on hanging out with. So my question is this: How important is it to go to school close to family and friends so you have a support system? Is it just an added stress to have to start over? I'm really torn on this, so any insight would be helpful.

270910
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby 270910 » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:30 am

Man, law school can chew you up and spit you out in ways you wouldn't imagine. The stress and uncertainty... it's all fake, which makes it even worse, because you feel like you don't even deserve the feelings of shame / inadequacy / fear that you'll undoubtedly wind up feeling.

But only from time to time. It's psychologically challenging, no doubt, but it's not like you need a resident nurse or anything :P

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iShotFirst
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby iShotFirst » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:31 am

It might be tough at first, but surely you will make some good friends when you get there who will then become your local support group without your family or old friends being around.

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haole_20
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby haole_20 » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:36 am

I just picked up and moved to Denver recently only knowing one person here. It's definitely a challenge to get acclimated to a new environment without any friends or family to really turn to. But that being said, Denver is an amazing city and i think you would be hard pressed to find someone who disagreed. Plus I would think the demands of law school would actually be helpful in the transition because it gives you structure and plenty of distraction.

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akili
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby akili » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:38 am

I'm curious about this as well. Almost all of my friends are staying in the NW, my family is in TX and I'm looking at Wake. Does it work out ok to go so far away from friends/family?

ConsideringLawSchool
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby ConsideringLawSchool » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:39 am

Personally, I would rather move to a new place to start law school. If I stay where I've been living and where a lot of my friends are located, I think that I would be very likely to remain in my old patterns--hanging out with the same people, going out to the same places with them, not really focusing on school as a new chapter. By contrast, if I end up in a new place, I'll be forced to get to know a whole new group of people and to define my life around law school.

In a past (short-term) job, I was struck by the difference between those of us who moved to the area for the job and those who were already living there. The folks from the area were always dashing out for commitments with family/friends and were much less likely to get full involved with the work crew. Those of us from out-of-town quickly became very close since we had nothing else :-)

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OperaSoprano
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby OperaSoprano » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:41 am

I know this will vary from person to person, and I have no doubt you will make tons of friends, but I couldn't have done this without a support system in place. I have friends who successfully moved thousands of miles and flourished, so I will say this: know thyself.

A very wise poster (Cleareyes) once told me that law school changes everyone. I was indignant, and said law school would not be changing me. He let me have it my own way, but of course he was right. This experience came very close to wrecking me at times, though on the whole, it's been marvelous, and yes, life altering. I'm very glad I stayed in New York for law school. I can't personally imagine having to do all this in a new city, without my old friends, and my aunt and uncle and grandmother nearby. I knew this about myself beforehand, however. I think you have to do some soul searching; you are the only one who can answer this question. If you do decide to go, work at building a support system in your new city, even before you arrive. It's crucial to have one; that much is true of every law student I have ever met.

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mhd08
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby mhd08 » Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:57 am

I guess it really does come down to knowing myself. I know I'll make new friends which will result in a new source of support. Hopefully ASD at Denver will help me decide. Thanks for the responses!

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Great Satchmo
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Re: The importance of having a support system during school.

Postby Great Satchmo » Mon Feb 22, 2010 5:49 pm

I'm considering the idea of picking up and moving across country (from San Francisco to Boston, or something of the like).

The idea of starting over with friends and everything is a bit daunting. However, in the end you're going to be spending a lot of time in/around school, with another 100-300 students, many in similar situations. I think your life becomes law school and other students for most people, regardless of where you lived before.




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